Looking around and you’re all different from me. “You look like your Mom, you got your dad’s teeth.” My parents are white, but I’m not the same. Feel so alone and I feel so ashamed. I got love, friends, and a roof over my head. I should be grateful and happy, but simply instead, I feel left out, there’s no one like me! Too Asian for the whites but still not Asian enough, Hold back these emotions though, I need to be tough. Words of affirmation but lacking affiliation, I don’t know who I am. Damn. “You’re cute for an Asian dude or go back to where you’re from,” Backhanded comments beat me like a drum. Racist faces behind welcoming eyes, Ignorance is bliss but it shouldn’t be a disguise. Come on, guys. I took this stuff and I just shoved it to the side, Kept pressing on, because there’s nowhere to hide. I reflect. I’m blessed. I grew up better than the rest, I digress, “Hey! You better do good on that math test! Asians are smart, you guys are good in school.” Maybe I wanted to be “less Asian,” and be more “cool.” You see the problem here? You see what’s lacking? Culture and education simply ain’t happening. But that isn’t the point folks, that’s not what these words are for, I write these things down to open the door, to love and acceptance, and a welcoming presence. Times are crazy right now, the world is askew, But maybe, just maybe guys, this is our cue. To be better than before and to rise above hate, And maybe, just maybe guys, we really can be great. To that little boy or girl that faces that opposition, rise above it and be strong, you’ll end up better than the competition. Learn to accept you’re different and to love your background. You’ll find yourself, your identity, and remove all doubt. You. are. you, not because of where you’re from, or where you ended up, To all my people out there you. are. you. That’s where it ends. And that is enough. Looking around and you’re all different from me. That’s just fine, I love who I am, where I came from, and now I’m free.
Jacob Soltysiak loves to spend time with his beautiful family, play baseball, and help be a voice to all adoptees that have felt or still feel as I do. He has been inspired and will continue to work on interesting ways to help express what so many others feel.